Naruto 507 Breakdown: Lies! All lies!! (De)motivational poster and last week’s debate results inclusive; plus, what I would like to call “comment(s) of the week.” WHOOP! The Naruto breakdown is not last for once!
`*logs onto WRA*
. . .
If you’re trying to decide which is funnier between the fact alone that he’s firing “random projectiles” in his sleep and the fact that these “projectiles” are fired right after being “curious on Orochimaru,” then we’re on the same boat. I suggest we just laugh at the whole.
But don’t worry, Kage. Your body is just going through some changes.
*dies of laughter before the flaming boulders start coming*
HAHAHA!! I SAID COMING!
Hello, my pretties! It is I, the Pickles Captain, coming to you live and direct from a reinforced panic room 500 ft in the ground. That leaves me with about five minutes until a certain raging individual claws his way through multiple layers of bare earth on a mission to exact a very painful revenge, which ultimately send me on a one-stop course to meet my maker for about the 6th time this past month.
Oh, that reminds me…I met some pretty cool people up there.
@Avatar: Papa says to not worry about him, so you just keep on livin’, brother. 😉
@Prawlkage: MJ says, “Ok, you can stop beating it now.” >_>
Don’t bother telling me, I already know I’m going to die a slow, painful death when my time has come—kind of like one particular character this last chapter showed us. But this is me getting ahead of myself.
I’ll start by saying last chapter had me reminiscing about the good old days of the series: the times when dead meant dead; when little boys looked like little girls; and when jonin were the finest specimen of badass known this side of the planet.
However, time has passed now, and for better, for worse, things have changed. Now, dead means Kabuto just got a new playmate, and little boys don’t look like little girls anymore. Grown men just look like grown women. Still, one man is determined to prove that some jonin still know their way around their victim’s behind, and find a suitable location to implant a deep, never-come-off footprint.
In my opinion, 507 wasn’t awesome. It was awe-a-lot.
Bad puns FTW!
It was nice to know, when I read the comments, that I wasn’t the only one who tried to make their hands like Gai. I think I got it just about right, but no giant tigers came shooting out. Even so, I wasn’t aimed at my baby cousin just yet.
So far, I’ve only spoken of Gai-sensei and his wild escapades. But that only accounted for about half of the chapter’s awesome.
We were briefly taken through two short stints of Kisame’s checkered past which featured some pretty interesting points of note: lies, lies, lies, and more lies! For all Kisame knows, the tooth fairy is a burly pro wrestler with a hockey stick.
“Can you smell what my bad acting is cooking?”
Yea, I didn’t see that movie, either…
So far, as the series has progressed, we have learned that each member of Akatsuki was not just a malicious s-class ninja killer. They were a malicious s-class ninja killer with purpose: one for which they sell their soul to a criminal organization.
Nagato: To make the world witness his own personal adaptation of justice, invariably bringing about “peace;” Itachi: to keep an eye on his village while maintaining an antagonist persona to make his killer into a hero.
Well, for Kisame, it was one thing: truth.
Yet, does he really know the truth about the one who calls himself Madara?
I’m truly at my wit’s end with this guy. I’m starting to believe that “Madara” may actually be two people!
For one thing, in this chapter, “Madara” was shown wearing bandages from torso to toe as if he were wounded throughout; whereas before AND after this very moment in time, the “same Madara” was depicted as having a human body which was…well…inhuman. Minato sent his left hand flying and he later plopped off his right arm like Action Man. And what came out? Creamy goo. Yea…not something you’d put a bandage on…especially not when you can just plop back the detached appendage like he has been shown to do.
And again, what manga character has two completely different hairstyles? Well “Madara” does. Prior to Konoha’s formation, it was long. A little while after that, sixteen years ago, it was short. About seven years after that, it was long again. A few years later (in this chapter) it was still long, but Heaven only knows what it was in-between. And now, in the present day, it’s back to looking like Elen Degeneres after black hair dying and gallons of hairspray.
So let’s see: long, then short, then long, and back to short…
Yup, it’s official. Madara’s hair is a penis.
So here we have two supposedly different heads and two supposedly different bodies. And coincidentally, each head has a specific body counterpart and vice versa, so there never is a crossing. In other words, short hair is to gooey body, and long hair is to normal body. Never have they been showed to be mixed or paired otherwise, which further hints to two supposedly different personalities.
Conclusion: there are supposedly two different “Madaras”…supposedly. >_>
In this case, the possibilities become even more wide open than they have ever been. I’d go about listing them one after the other, but my time is quickly running out.
Well hey, I’m sure that my logic is flawed at some point; I just haven’t found where that is. Maybe you can help me with that?
In the end, before we can really find out for sure, Kisame goes all Million Dollar Baby and bites his own tongue to snap himself back to consciousness. And, well…
Biting one’s tongue (hard enough) leads to exsanguination. That’s physician speak for “bleeding to death.” And the way Kisame is looking, it seems he’ll be following me to the same place I’ll be going by the time this breakdown is finished.
Gai is still not completely out of commission. Yamato can still make fine firewood. Naruto can surely work up a decent fire. And Killer Bee doesn’t need chakra for some slicing and dicing.
Well guys, I dare say these boys will be be having themselves some grilled sushi tonight.
Oh boy. This was a toughie. Almost every entry was a great one. But! There had to be some cuts.
Kisame:(awakes from sleep) WTF! its gonna eat me! awwwwwwww.my worst nightmare came tr-..
samehada:shut up im not ur fu**ing dick thats gonna eat ur head.
Caption: The moral is”Look before u scream noobs”
4) Lol! I just saw this one! First with the double D’s and now this. Well whad’you know, Baron. We do think alike.
(From left to right again)
Same thing we do every night Pinky, try to take over the world!
I’ve got a feeling they’ll fail again… >__>
3) 会長加賀 Chairman Kaga
I’ll take you to the candy shop. I’ll let you lick the lollipop. Go ‘head girl, don’t you stop. Keep going ’til you hit the spot…
Gigigigigigigig! Translation: Stop! Im a guy!
Caption: Language Barrier: Makes you wonder, who gets “screwed” in this relationship…
samada-i had the time of my liiiife and i owe it all to youuu….
bee-Girl…It’s easy to love me now ,Would you love me if I was down and out?Would you still have love for me?
caption-love…. can get past racial barriers…. black rapper+ spiky vagina sword forever….. ❤
You guys think you’re so clever with the 50 Cent references, knowing KB’s Pickles-assigned stage name…well you are! >_>
Samehada: GiGiGiGiGiGiGi!! *♫He tastes like Octopus and he’s chakra loaded, big and thick and dumb as a stick, what would you dooo, for a Biju Bar♪*(sung to the toon of the Klondike bar song)
Kirabee: What’s that Sasuke fell down a well!!…..and the well commited suicide?
Caption: This manga panel brought to you by Google Translator =P
The next entry was just so long, it won’t even fit in the bubbles.
But it still just had to win.
This week’s material…
Ahaha! Lol! OMG…
I’m not even going to pretend like I can find the words to describe that.
This is exactly what I was after when proposed that seemingly lopsided debate. Didn’t think it would work, though. Lol…well…
I won’t bother complimenting all battlers from both sides on a wonderful job, because apart from the fact that everyone else already has, the commendation just goes without question.
However, there still must be a winner.
Conventionally, a debate is not always about who really is better and who isn’t. It is designed for the purpose of persuasion. In politics, the aim is to make the public see your side and take it. There isn’t much difference here. Normally, I would be the sole “public” to be the judge. But considering the magnitude of this debate, I decided it would only be fair to extend that privilege.
So, in consideration of all comments submitted (one, specifically, which I will refrain from naming for the blogger’s own safety. <_<) I declare the winner!
A hair’s breadth is too far too great a space to describe the margin by which this victory was claimed.
Team Orochimaru was able to do that. And for their support, all children they may have in the future will remain undefiled…at least for a while. >_>
There won’t be a debate this week. I think everyone’s earned a break. 😉
And this week’s demotivational:
*sits calmly crossed-legged on a single chair and sips on a cup of tea*
*notices deafening rumble as light from above bursts through the newly marked opening of the panic room*
Captain Pickles: *without taking attention from beverage* “I knew you were coming…”
Kantonkage: “I knew you knew I was coming.”
Captain Pickles: “?!”
Kantonkage: “That’s why I decided to bring along a little surprise…”
*slowly lifts eyes higher*
*watches as hundreds of weapons ranging from farming tools to semi-automatics are rhythmically tapped against multiple palms, red hot with rage*
*the owners of each hand, with a certain pink-haired four-eyes in front, made no effort in hiding their chests and what was emblazoned on their uniform t-shirts: a single cucumber, circled once, and stroked over with red ink…and below, a very simple sentence…”Pein won, you bastard.“*
Kantonkage: “This is where you squeal.”
See you guys next life.
But give me love over this.