Martial Arts Movies You Need to Watch pt. 1 – The Protector

El (aka Elfarren) here, with a new section of WRA that I’ve been eager to include in the awesomeness of the new blog ^_^ So, without further introduction …

Do you like martial arts movies? Yes! What about martial arts movies where one guy kicks so much @$$ your eyeballs pop out of your head from an overdose of action? Yes!! Do you care if the movie has a decent plot?

You know if Tarantino is involved it's gonna be good!

You know if Tarantino is involved it's gonna be good!

If you answered NO! to that last question, then I know the perfect movie to fill your every @$$ kicking desire ^_^ It’s called “The Protector”, and stars a man you all needed to know about yesterday, because if you ever cross paths and you try to fight this dude, you will die. No joke x_x His name is Tony Jaa, and this man is like an awesomeness Superman … wearing Converse.

Run faster, jump higher, kick harder!

Run faster, jump higher, kick harder!

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s … Tony Jaa? You bet it is! This dude literally flies through the air toward his opponents, whereupon he proceeds to beat them to a pulp so fast they have to slow the camera down or you’ll miss the action. One badguy, a hundred bad guys … it doesn’t really matter – Tony Jaa will take them all down. Even in slow motion it’s hard to make out exactly how fast he’s kicking so much @$$, but that’s all just part of the fun, because like I mentioned before, the plot to this movie is pretty laughable. Still interested? Read on …

Because everyone knows elephant tusks make the best jungle gyms ^_^

Because everyone knows elephant tusks make the best jungle gyms ^_^

Imagine, if you will, that you live in Thailand and ever since you were a small child, you’ve been trained in the art of Muay Thai to protect war elephants for the emperor. (Stop laughing, I hear you back there!) This is a very important job because the strength of the emperor’s elephant is a reflection of the might of the emperor himself *rolls eyes at everyone who snickered louder after reading the last sentence* Now, imagine that someone steals not only your elephant, but your elephant’s baby, too. What would you do?

Don't mess with this dude's elephants!

Don't mess with this dude's elephants!

If you were Tony Jaa, you’d fly to Sydney and kick some serious @$$, that’s what you’d do! You have to get your elephants back quick, because said elephant-nappers didn’t just take your elephants to be part of the circus … no, that’s too PG … these guys stole your elephants to serve them up in an endangered species restaurant frequented by all the mob bosses of the Sydney underworld. Does including mobsters make the plot line any cooler? No, I don’t think so either, but the sheer amount of carnage Tony Jaa unleashes in the course of the movie makes up for that ^_^

Oh, and did I mention that he does all the @$$ kicking in this movie without the use of stunt doubles, CGI, or wires?  No “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” BS here … Tony Jaa is straight up awesomeness of a kind that is rarely found anymore these days.

This is the first of a series of posts to come where I will recommend some of my favorite martial arts movies to watch for those not familiar with the genre, and barring the laughable plot of “The Protector”, this is an great movie to start with. You can find it in your local megamart for under $10, so pick through the cushions and go buy this flick, you won’t regret it!

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~ by elfarren on June 17, 2009.

20 Responses to “Martial Arts Movies You Need to Watch pt. 1 – The Protector”

  1. First

  2. Second!!! now to read this thing.

  3. Third!

  4. *is still sniggering*
    Don’t want anyone to steal YOUR elephant and YOUR elephant baby! XDD
    Well, martial arts aren’t really my cup of tea, and these days I barely have time for the movies I DO like but… I will enjoy reading these recommendations. ^^
    Who knows? Maybe one day I might find something interesting!
    *is still chuckling into her fist*

  5. First is the worst,
    Second is the be-, err rather terrible also,
    third is the one with the hairy chest,
    and FOURTH is PWNSOME ! =D LoL.

    @dynamic: yeah … you might wanna get that checked out …(=|
    LoL jk.

  6. Ha, i\’ve seen this. It\’s an awesome movie. This is the same dude that did \’Ong Bak\’ isn\’t it?
    I still like Jet Li better though. I mean Fearless, IMO, had plenty of ass beating as well as an awesome plot. So it\’s win win 😉
    (also Unleashed and Rouge Assassin were awesome sauce)

  7. random man calls out: HONEY I’VE MISPLACED THE EMPEROR’S ELEPHANT AGAIN!
    woman: is that what that thing was? i made it for lunch..just trying to make you as strong as the emperor 🙂
    man: *face palms* QUICK WE NEED A NEW ONE!!

    *random lamp has been dressed up as an elephant for the emperors visit*

  8. I’ve seen this! Tony Jaa is a great fighter! And this movie has some great fights! Tony Jaa feat. The Capoeira Guy, is awesome!
    I think Ong Bak is a better movie. I don’t know if you guys saw Ong Bak 2? That’s nice, but defenitely not as great as part one.

    Now if you want to see Awesomenesss, you have got to see Ip Man.
    Donnie Yen kicking @$$ Wing Chun Style! Great movie!

  9. lol…elephants.

  10. @Freud: I think ‘The Protector’ is ‘Ong Bak 2’….

    Both movies were awesome in the whole scheme of things anyway. Graet movie recommendation Elfarren! 😀 This movie is truly kick ass and Tony Jaa is the next Jackie Chan…screw Jet Li. 😛

    Lol, I just did that for Mudshovel I like Jet Li but Jackie Chan is better.

    1. Jackie Chan

    2. Jet Li (Soon to be Tony Jaa)

    3. Tony Jaa (Patience you’ll be #2 soon enough)

    4. Jason Stathm

  11. @Super. LOL. have u seen the forbidden kingdom where Jackie chan nad Jet li fight each other?
    I think Tony Jaa is good, but he’s pretty conceited.
    AND LOL Jason Statham. priceless – his movies are also awesome!

  12. @Mudshovel: Lol, yeah I just wanted to put a well known non Asian martial arts fighter in there.

    ‘Forbidden Kingdom’ is an unfair judgment. Jackie Chan’s old now. Compare Jet Li’s past and present movies to Jackie Chan’s legendary previous movies and Jackie Chan wins hands down. ‘Drunken Fist’ is all I’m gonna say.

  13. I wasn’t comparing them – i was just asking if you’d seen the movie. lol.
    It doesn’t really bother me who’s better out of them.
    Jackie Chan makes comedy action movies that are awesome.
    And Jet Li makes plain badass action movies.

  14. @Mudshovel: Ah I see…*looks for something else to debate on and finds Marksman post* 0_0

    AHA! This will do just fine. 🙂

  15. Elephants… heh. Sounds sorta cool, I’m into the genre, but it was an interesting read.

  16. @supertrek: About Ong Bak2. The Protector is also called Tom Yum Goong. But also Ong bak 2. However in 2008 there was also a Tony Yaa movie, which is called Ong Bak 2. SO there are 2 Ong bak 2’s, both completely different movies. Maybe it’s Thai logic.

    The best Martial Artist? Bruce Lee. Keep an eye on Donnie Yen.

  17. wait super, that better be a list of people who are alive and not a list of your favorite ever…cuz if it is!!! *shakes fist threateningly*

    1. Bruce Lee

    2. Jackie Chan

    3. Jean Claude Van Damme

    4. Jet Li

    5. Jason David Frank (others may know him as…Green Power Ranger)

    You may laugh at the last one, but look him up…he’s legit…I met him once…my Sensei is friends with one of the other instructors at his school and while he visited Chicago once he dropped in for a surprise teaching session at our dojo…he’s no joke…he are awesomeness

  18. I don’t care what anyone thinks – a list without Donnie Yen on it isn’t complete. Look for him in martial arts movie breakdowns to come ^_^

  19. So you’ve seen Ip Man? Finally somebody…

  20. Ive seen this film and yeah tony jaa is the man! i agree with you guys that said his first film Ong Bak is even better though, if you havent seen i seriously recommend it… absolutely awesome

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